The night that Governor Ernie Fletcher pardoned 14 staff members and supporters who had been indicted for possible merit-system violations, I was freshly resigned from my position as executive director of communications for the Commerce Cabinet, which then was headed by Secretary Jim Host.

As surely everyone will recall, the Governor announced the pardons in perhaps the most bizarre press conference ever held in the state capitol rotunda. Instead of being somber and apologetic, the Governor came off as a cheerleader leading a pep rally. Or an evangelist whipped the faithful into a frenzy. It went way beyond spin. It was a cuckoo’s nest, and Lt. Governor Steve Pence was flying over it.

Pence, who also served as Secretary of the Justice Cabinet, was the only Cabinet Secretary who wasn’t part of the cheering throng. That spoke volumes to me, especially since I had already heard, through the government grapevine, that Fletcher’s inner circle — Stan Cave, Brian Crall, John Roach, Daniel Groves, Dick Murgatroyd, and a few others — already had been talking about dropping Pence from the ticket in 2008.

Energetic and enthusiastic, Pence already was having trouble swallowing the Fletcher Kool-Aid. He was too independent to suit the “disciples,” which is how Fletcher’s inner circle was derisively known in some administration circles. I figured it was only a matter of time before Pence’s conscience trumped his loyalty to the boss.

When the merit-system allegations broke in late May, 2005, I was among those who urged the Governor and his chief of staff, Stan Cave, to adopt a sort of “Three-A” approach — admit mistakes, apologize, and act to make amends. Citing the lessons of Watergate, I mentioned that a cover-up always turned out worse than the crime.

(I’ve always had a bad habit of telling my bosses what I truly believe instead of what they might want to hear. It simply isn’t in my nature to be a “yes-man.”)

But our pleas fell on deaf ears in the Governor’s office. For many of us, the “pep rally” was dismaying, disappointing, and disillusioning. It also meant that many good ideas and proposals and initiatives were delayed, deferred, or derailed because from then on, the Governor’s office was consumed by the investigation.

I supposed my fate was sealed when I refused to participate in a “smear” campaign against Attorney General Greg Stumbo that some powerful Republican leaders, both in and out of the Governor’s office, wanted to orchestrate and spread to the rank-and-file throughout the state. I felt it was unethical, counter-productive, mean-spirited, and simply wrong. This was in mid-July of 2005. I resigned, caught in the middle of a serious rift between the Governor and Host, on July 28.

I hated to leave. Until the merit-system scandal broke, I was enjoying my work in state government as much as I’ve enjoyed anything in my career. I discovered that our Cabinet was full of talented, committed, hard-working people who really wanted — as I did — to do what they could to make our state a better place. We were on the brink of initiating many positive programs and changes. But it all fell apart because of the Governor’s decision to fight Stumbo by accusing him of conducting a political “witch hunt” instead of adopting the “Three-A” approach.

It was like seeing a train wreck developing and being powerless to stop it.

The schism between Fletcher and Pence finally became public last year when Pence beat all the Governor’s men to the punch, taking himself off the ticket before he could be replaced. He also resigned as Secretary of the Justice Cabinet, but Fletcher was constitutionally unable to fire him as Lt. Governor. Since then, the atmosphere in the capitol has been cold as a meat locker. The offices of Fletcher, Pence, and Stumbo are close enough to throw a big tent over.

When Pence told his staff that he intended to support former U.S. Rep. Anne Northup in her bid to wrest the party’s nomination away from Fletcher, they all resigned, apparently due to loyalty to the Governor. For the duration, Pence’s “staff” apparently will consist of volunteers who will do little more than answer the telephone.

Say what you will about Pence, but at least concede that he has the courage of his convictions. In a Frankfort press conference attended by Northup, he made good on his pledge to support her. He also gave an exclusive interview to the Lexington Herald-Leader in which he opined that the motivation behind Fletcher’s pardons and his subsequent deal with Stumbo to end the investigation was simply to keep more damaging information from becoming public.

I suspect strongly that Pence is right on the money. The deal between Fletcher and Stumbo might have ended the investigation, but it certainly didn’t end the speculation. If anything, it fueled it.

I hope, but have no confidence, that Fletcher’s campaign staff will take the high road in the battle against Northup. If they try to exploit the religious, gender, racial, and  anti-Louisville prejudices that still exist in pockets of ignorance around the commonwealth, it will be beyond deplorable. It will be despicable.

I commend Lt. Governor Pence for standing up on behalf of everybody who worked in the Fletcher administration — or who are still working there — who sincerely wanted to clean up the waste, fraud, and abuse in state government. The Governor and his men betrayed our ideals and confidence. Yet I, for one, still believe in state government’s potential to do better, to meet its responsibilities and obligations to our citizens, and to rid itself of the pettiness and selfishness that has characterized it for far too long.

I’m just trying to figure out which candidate has the best credentials to get that done.